Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Fly killing...a sport anyone can try

If there's one thing in the world I can't stand, it's flies in the house. These vile things are my nemeses. I will use all means at my disposal to get rid of them...fly swatters, shovels, cannons—whatever it takes that will do the job. One of the most satisfying means of getting rid of flies, however, is towel flipping. This is the method I use:

  1. Grab a towel. A thin one is better than a thick one.
  2. Start at a corner and roll the towel so that the first roll is about two inches across. Roll until the entire towel is rolled up making a long strip.
  3. Wet the pointed end of the rolled up towel with regular tap water.
  4. Fold the non-wet end over itself about five inches, so that you have a good handhold, and something to stop the towel from coming unrolled.

Once you have your towel ready to flip, use a quick wrist action to flip it, so that the wet end snaps like the crack of a whip. Practice, practice, practice. When you feel confident in your ability to knock over full glasses of milk, thousand dollar vases, and antique china, you are ready to tackle flies. Try stationary flies first. See if you can flick them off of priceless glassware. Once you have perfected this, it is time to try for the beasts in flight. Knocking a fly out of the air with a loud “SNAP” will leave you feeling positively pumped. If you hate flies like I do, give it a try the next time the kids leave the doors open a bit too long, and the ugly little buggers get in.

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